Originally Posted by
arizona
Allison will admit she is Meow McFierceyes, an alien superspy/superhero here to arrest Tyra (who is actually the monstrous Fivehead, an evil creature responsible for the demise of planets Sense, Reason, Continuity, Modesty and Altruism) for her horrible crimes. Tyra (Fivehead) then shows her true self, which is a monstrous form consisting of just a forehead and the two of them battle it out. Initially confused, but willing to slay the beast, Angelea and Lisa transform together into the mutation called Angelisa: The Crazy, Ex-Alcoholic Bitch, Bank-employee, 716, Open Legged, Realness, Educated, Sunglasses of Doom, Whoah, Neon, Still That Booked Bitch of AWESOME and help Meow McFierceyes in her quest.
Even though the ethereal alien and her mutated friends seem to appear on the winning hand, Nigel Barker reveals himself as the evil conspirator of the Fivehead's master plans: Pervman Boobsinsight. It also becomes clear that his British accent has been fake all along, since his native language is Orcish. He makes his move, brutally killing Angelisa with comments like: "The camera hates you!", "Your legs are always open, do you want me to [...]!" and "I do NOT have a stick up my arse!".
Meow McFierceyes is now alone in her battle and the loss of her dear friends has harmed her deeply. Yet, by preferring another photographer over Pervman Boobsinsight, she manages to weaken him. Her last lash against him is by throwing a wig in his face, saying: "You shall be cursed as I am; since that you find the most beautiful you can never have! My desire is nosebleeds and your desire is hair! We shall be bound in never acquiring these goals!" This is the demise of Pervman Boobsinsight.
The Fivehead does not seem to care about the sudden death of her minion, as human emotions mean nothing to her evil, alien mind. She starts to roar, exclaiming that she has never in her life yelled at a girl like this. Then, Fivehead makes her final move and upon bellowing that she was rooting for Meow (and that they were all rooting for Meow), she lets Meow fall to the ground.
As the Fivehead laughs her evil laugh and prepares to crush Meow McFierceyes once and for all and all hope seems lost - a strange sound suddenly echoes through the set of the final runway. It sounds like... "wonderful"? Or, no, perhaps... "fabulous"?
"What is this?!" yells the Fivehead, but then it is already too late.
In comes J.A.D.E, the supercomputer/goddess, invented by Drag Queens, Ancient Dinosaurs and Undiscovered Supermodels on a planet somewhere close to the Belly of the Beast, where the ancient and most beautiful race of the Biracial Butterflies reside. J.A.D.E rejuvenates Angelisa and Meow McFierceyes through the powers of her long, red mermaid hair and with the strength of a Soldier's Sister (recognise), J.A.D.E banishes Fivehead to the evil pits of the Vagina Arms, where she will stay until the Chosen One arrives in this world. But that... is another story.
(yes, I know, I don't have life. yes, I know, I should've totally written Modelland.)
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It is the highlight of my time on the interwebs.
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